Judge Moore’s latest, most powerful new commercial sure to get him to Washington.
Courtesy of The Spiegel Group/ D.C.Douglas
Photo | truepundit.com
With Alabama’s special election for the U.S. Senate less than 10 days away, it appears Republican Roy Moore is poised for victory. Despite allegations he may be a sexual predator, voters in the Yellowhammer State are rallying around the twice-fired State Supreme Court justice.
In an effort to learn more about why Alabamians are supporting a candidate accused of pedophilia and of disobeying the United States Constitution, the Daily Nooze interviewed retired Tuscaloosa schoolteacher, Sally Sue Scruggs.
DN: “Mrs. Scruggs, you have stated that despite all the allegations against Roy Moore you will still vote for him in the upcoming election. Could you please tell us why?
Scruggs: “As you yourself just said, these are allegations. I don’t believe them. I don’t believe all the women who have come out against Judge Moore. And even if what they say is true, I forgive him. That’s the Christian thing to do.”
DN: “ So there is nothing that would stop you from voting for Mr. Moore?”
Scruggs: “No. My daddy taught me a long time ago that voting is easy. It doesn’t require much thinking. You just have to vote for the candidate with the “R” next to his name.”
DN: “So you would vote for Mr. Moore even if he were, say, a tax cheat or a convicted murderer?”
Scruggs: “I have faith that Judge Moore is not a tax cheat and he is not a convicted murderer.”
DN: “ What if Mr. Moore engaged in necrophilia?”
Scruggs: “The Bible says nothing about that … whatever it is.”
DN: “What if Mr. Moore raped your daughter in the middle of the town square?”
Scruggs: “Which daughter … my 12 year old or my 18 year old?”
With that answer, the interview came to an end.
The latest polls show Roy Moore ahead of Democrat Doug Jones just days before the Dec. 12 election. Even as the controversy around Moore continues, his numbers appear to be climbing.
As Donald Trump bluntly put it, “We don’t need a liberal person in there, a Democrat, Jones. I’ve looked at his record. It’s terrible on crime. It’s terrible on the border. It’s terrible on the military.”
And Roy Moore has an “R” after his name.
Photo | politico.com
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***The Daily Nooze*** – named #10 top political satire blog by blog.feedspot.com
At a time when women accusing powerful men of sexual misconduct has turned into a daily ritual, another dominant male has been ensnared in allegations of sexual impropriety going back decades.
Pope Francis has been accused of groping two nuns during his years as a seminary student at the Inmaculada Concepción Seminary, in Villa Devoto, Buenos Aires.
The nuns, who chose to remain anonymous, have told reporters that the Holy Father copped a feel while they were waiting in line to give their weekly confessions at the Catedral Metropolitana, Buenos Aires. The alleged incidents took place in the summer of 1955.
“From out of nowhere I felt a hand squeeze my buttocks” said one of the nuns. The second nun told the same story of a surprise, unwanted touching.
Vatican spokesman, Father Guido Sarducci, issued a statement that neither confirmed nor denied the accusations.
“The Pope does not recall any incidents of improper touching during his years at the seminary. The alleged groping goes back 62 years. One has to ask why the nuns would wait so long to accuse the Vicar of Christ.”
Catholics throughout the world are in shock, not knowing what to make of the allegations. Many are simply praying, “Please say it ain’t so, Papa.”
One powerful male facing sexual misconduct allegations of his own has come to the Pope’s defense … Donald Trump.
“This is ridiculous,” said Trump. “Why would the Pope grope a nun? They are generally very homely. I would say on average a four. Have you ever seen a hot nun except in the movies?”
Father Sarducci went on to say, “Pardon the pun, but the Pope does not make it a habit of forcing himself on nuns or any females for that matter.”
If the allegations are true, expect more nuns to come forward in the days ahead.
It is being rumored that the two nuns accusing the Pope of sexual misconduct have contacted Lisa Bloom, a lawyer famous for representing female victims of sexual harassment and assault.
Photos | courageouschristianfather.com – pinterest.com
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According to recent news reports, Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson, referred to Trump as a moron.
While Tillerson sought to refute the claim at an impromptu news conference shortly after the story broke, going so far as to refer to his boss as “smart,” he did not specifically deny having called Trump a dumb, stupid moron.
This Tuesday, Trump was quoted by Forbes as saying, “I think it’s fake news, but if he did that, I guess we’ll have to compare IQ tests. And I can tell you who is going to win.”
As of this date, Tillerson has not accepted Trump’s challenge.
Yesterday, a group of recently naturalized citizens issued a challenge of their own to the 45th president of the United States … “Can you pass the U.S. Citizenship Test?”
Trump took the exam and failed miserably, scoring 50% (Six of the ten questions need to be answered correctly to pass).
The self-proclaimed genius has claimed the test was fixed and contained too many trick questions.
Here are the five out of 10 “trick questions” Trump failed to correctly answer:
According to U.S. Citizenship and Immigration Services, 91% of foreign-born applicants pass the naturalization test. But, in Trump’s defense, they have an unfair advantage … they tend to study.
Photos| tusconsentinal.com, cnn.com
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Donald Trump spoke of “the calm before the storm” yesterday at a White House dinner for his top military brass. No one knows exactly what he was talking about. Might he simply be predicting the next major hurricane?
Photos| spartanideas.msu.edu. rollingstone.com
In an effort to de-escalate tensions between their respective countries, Donald Trump has invited North Korean leader, Kim Jong-un, to a friendly game of golf at his Mar-a-Lago resort.
“I’ve always said some of my best deals have been negotiated on the golf course,” boasted Trump. “The fake news media gives me such a hard time with all the golf I’ve played as president. What they don’t tell the American people is that I’m actually working while I’m golfing.”
The idea of using sports to improve relations with an adversary is not new.
When Richard Nixon sought a thaw in American relations with China in the early 1970s, he resorted to table tennis. In what later came to be known as “Ping Pong” diplomacy, the two countries that had not had diplomatic or economic relations for nearly 20 years, finally broke the ice. Nixon’s gambit turned out to be successful, resulting in opening the U.S.-China relationship and leading the U.S. to lift its embargo against the People’s Republic of China on June 10, 1971.
Already Trump’s attempt to find common ground with North Korea through the game of golf is being called “Fairway Finesse.”
Someone on the White House staff brought up the fact that there is only one golf course in North Korea and Kim is not known to be a player. Wouldn’t Trump, a lifelong golfer, embarrass a man who has probably never held a golf club?
“That’s nonsense,” snapped Trump. “From all I hear Kim is a natural athlete, like his father Kim Jong-il. I heard Kim is a big hockey fan … that he played a secret exhibition game with some of the NHL’s biggest stars and notched a Gordie Howe hat trick in his first time on the ice. And he did it while playing goalie!”
Legend has it the elder Kim was perhaps the greatest athlete of his time. It is well documented he shot five holes-in-one in his first try at golf, only to be followed by a perfect 300 game in bowling … on the same day!
Whether Kim takes Trump up on his offer remains to be seen. But, in an encouraging sign, it is being reported that the legendary golf instructor, Butch Harmon, will be accompanying Kim’s good friend, Dennis Rodman, on his visit to North Korea next week.
The Pentagon, as the entire world, is hoping Kim accepts Trump’s invitation so that our skilled golfer and negotiator-in-chief can work his magic in getting North Korea to give up its nuclear program, making our world that much safer.
Asked for further comment, Trump said, “We’ll see what happens.”
Photo | express.co.uk
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***Breaking News as reported by MoronMajority.com***
Donald Trump is deporting Lady Liberty.
By way of a controversial executive order signed yesterday, Trump is packing up the iconic symbol of American freedom and shipping her off to her country of birth.
“Since 1886, she has been standing in New York Harbor welcoming the tired, the poor and huddled masses,” said Trump. “No more. What she really has welcomed to our shores are criminals, drug dealers and rapists. And some good people, I’m sure.”
“We just can’t afford to have all those foreigners continue to take our good American jobs. And we can’t afford giving them free stuff like food, clothing and shelter, either. Did you know she actually asks other countries to send us their homeless?” Trump pointed out.
Trump has a few ideas for the pedestal that wll remain on Liberty Island.
“I think we should honor a true patriot with a statute. Robert E. Lee, a great man and fabulous general comes to mind,” offered Trump. “Or we could honor one of the greatest American presidents and my favorite, Andrew Jackson. And, by the way, there is no way a radical like Harriet Tubman is going to replace Old Hickory on the twenty-dollar bill. Not while I’m president.”
When informed of the news, French president, Emmanuel Macron, was saddened his country’s gift to America, commemorating the alliance of France and the United States during the American Revolution, was being returned.
“This truly is a dark day for liberty, democracy and for all the peoples of the world that look to America as a beacon of hope,” said Macron. ”But we will re-gift it to a country that still believes in the ideals Lady Liberty stands for … our great friend Canada.”
Mass protests have already broken out in major cities throughout the United States. Americans are up in arms over the removal of the beloved statue.
“Yes, there are some Americans who want to keep Lady Liberty, whose real name is La Liberté éclairant le monde, by the way,” said Trump. “But there are also many people who want her to go. I think many more people.”
An online petition has been started for Congress to pass a law protecting the Statue of Liberty and overriding Trump’s executive order.
Will Congress act in time?
Photo | modernliberals.com
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Following through on what he hinted at during Tuesday’s campaign rally in Phoenix, Arizona, Donald Trump has pardoned Joe Arpaio, the controversial former Maricopa County sheriff who was convicted of criminal contempt related to his hard-line tactics going after undocumented immigrants.
According to White House Press Secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders, this is the first of a series of presidential pardons planned by her boss. Convicted mass murderer Charles Manson is next on the list.
The Daily Nooze was afforded an exclusive interview with Donald Trump where the subject of Manson’s pardon was discussed.
Daily Nooze: “Sir, your pardoning of Sheriff Arpaio is being derided by many as a perversion of justice. It would seem pardoning Charles Manson will only further inflame your critics.”
Trump: “Do I not have the Constitutional power to pardon anyone I want?”
Daily Nooze: “Yes, but Charles Manson was convicted on 27 counts of murder and is currently serving 27 life sentences. Why should he be shown any leniency?”
Trump: “Yes, Charlie is an evil man. But is that all he is? There are two sides to everything and to everyone. You’ve never done something bad in your life?”
Daily Nooze: “ But he was the leader of a cult that killed seven people, including the pregnant actress Sharon Tate. He believed in “Helter Skelter” … in anarchy.”
Trump: “Look, Charlie never killed anybody. His people did that, all right? He got a bum rap as far as I’m concerned. He has spent 45 years in the big house, is now 82 years old and in bad health. I think he has paid his dues to society. He has been rehabilitated, from what I can tell. Letting him see a little bit of freedom before he dies is the Christian thing to do. Remember our god is a god of mercy.”
Daily Nooze: “You know he was sentenced to be executed but was only spared because California abolished the death penalty.”
Trump: “Yes, I know that. The Lord spared him then and I will spare him now. Did you know Charlie was a great musician before he decided to become a mass murderer? That counts for something, believe me.”
Trump says he became a Charles Manson fan after watching his biography on the History Channel.
Photos | en.wikipedia.org
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After a run on Tiki torches at the local Home Depot, a large group of white nationalists marched through the streets of Charlottesville, Va. to demonstrate their hatred and fear of non-whites … and mosquitoes.
Reports indicate not one single supremacist was bitten by the dreaded insect but a few were beaten up by counter-protesters.
Home Depot anticipates having more torches in stock within a few days.
Photo | randyrainbow/facebook
Donald Trump thanked Vladimir Putin for expelling more than 700 U.S. diplomats from Russia in response to increased sanctions.
Just like with his own fervent supporters, Trump remains loyal to his hero. Putin could shoot a political opponent in the middle of Red Square and not lose our president’s support!
Photo | businessinsider.com