Texas U.S. Representative, Louie Gohmert, is the latest Republican to turn down Donald Trump’s offer to be his VP pick. This latest slap in the face has left the Trump campaign in a complete state of chaos.
Gohmert makes the 25th Republican politician to refuse Trump’s rose. Said a Trump spokesman, who requested to remain anonymous, “In our wildest dreams, we did not believe we would ever be in this position.”
The Trump campaign, along with the entire world of political pundits, believed Trump’s first VP pick would grab the chance at being Trump’s number two man… well, woman. Sarah Palin had lobbied hard for a second shot at the second spot but, in the end, she developed a serious case of cold feet.
“I really wanted to do it but I thought I should first check in with my lord and savior for guidance,” said Palin. “He didn’t come out and specifically tell me Donald would lose the presidency but he strongly hinted at that.”
“I really enjoyed campaigning with John last time around,” Palin continued. “I just didn’t think I could take another loss. And anyway, my life is going great! Did you know I am going to have my own Judge Judy-type TV show soon?”
The anonymous Trump spokesman confirmed there would be a new game plan going forward. The list of potential VP picks would now be made up of only non-politicians. The word is that Trump would like another celebrity to join him on the ticket.
Some names that have been rumored to be on Trump’s list are: Joe Pesci, Clint Eastwood and Ted Nugent.
Trump recently stated if he does not find a running mate soon, he would be more than happy not having one.
“Look, I am the smartest person I know. I’ve always worked better alone. Why do I need a VP anyway?” asked Trump. When confronted with the fact that a vice president is required under our Constitution, Trump morphed into his testy self.
“There are a lot of things in the Constitution we do not follow!” bellowed Trump. “Hey, we had a Canadian running for president for god’s sake! This would not even be as close a big deal as that!”
Get ready Joe for that big phone call!
Photo | breitbart.com
Charles Sloane says
He could also use his alter ego, the Orange Orangutan, or one of his old Publicists, David Miller, I think was his name. If this isn’t the ship going down, I don’t know what is. Keep up the name calling, you skin-thinned, narcissistic, bigoted racist. You’ll actually start alienating the low educated supporters you have. You do have great words.
John DeProspo says
Yes, one of Trump’s alter egos might do! I disagree with your suggestion that Trump could ever do anything, no matter how outrageous, to alienate his core supporters. This is a cult of personality we are talking about.
Frank Little says
I’m shocked! Kudos to Palin for consulting with her savior first! Can’t wait to see her new comedy series (Palin as Judge Judy!)
John DeProspo says
Palin is going to dispense the law but knows nothing about the law! You’re right, should be fun!