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Dems Mocking Move To Shore Up Italian Vote

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Reprint from moronmajority.com

Republicans are not the only ones intentionally mispronouncing the name of the Democratic VP candidate, Kamala Harris. It seems that Democrats themselves have gotten into the act.

In their outreach to Italian American voters, who lean heavily to Trump and the GOP, Democrats are calling Kamala … Carmela!

The effort appears to be paying off as many Italian Americans have a positive reaction to the very Italian name, Carmela.

“My mother’s name is Carmela, as was her mother’s and her mother’s mother,” said Vinny Scappaticci, owner of Vinny’s Humungo Pizzeria and Donut Shop in the swing state of Pennsylvania.

“How could I not vote for a Carmela?” asked Mr. Scappaticci.

But won’t those same Italian voters who are looking to support “Carmela” Harris get confused once they see her correct name on the ballot?

“No,” said a Biden/Harris campaign strategist who chose to remain anonymous. “They will think it’s a typo, most likely. In any event, our research has shown most Italian Americans are not the greatest spellers.”

Oh snap!

Photo | bigpieinthesky.com

moronmajority.com is a satirical site … seriously!

Growing Concern Over Melania GOP Convention Speech … Who Will She Endorse?

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Reprint from moronmajority.com*

She never wanted any of it.

Melania Trump was perfectly happy living in her gilded tower high above New York’s Fifth Avenue. The woman who some have described as the most reluctant First Lady is scheduled to give a speech at next week’s Republican National Convention. It is being reported she will deliver her speech from the newly renovated White House Rose Garden.

Campaign officials are worried because, unlike in the past, Melania has decided to write her own speech. Alarmingly, she has refused to share it with anyone.

It is no great mystery that Melania Trump is not a happy camper. We see it in her dour face. We see it when she refuses to hold her husband’s hand in public. Does she simple loathe her husband or does she hate the whole business of politics? No one really knows.

Gossips are speculating the First Lady will file for divorce the first chance she gets after leaving the Peoples’ House. They remind us of how Melania initially refused to move to the White House after her husband’s inauguration so that son Barron “could finish school in New York.” It has been reported that Melania used her holdout as leverage for renegotiating her prenuptial agreement with Trump.

What concerns Trump’s campaign staff the most is that the First Lady might go rogue and do the unthinkable during her speech … announce she is endorsing Joe Biden!

“Enough is enough” might not just be a catch phrase for Democrats.

Photo | graziadaily.co.uk

*moronmajority.com is a satirical site … seriously!

Even As Trump Tries To “Kneecap” The Postal Service, He Demonstrates His Incompetence

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By now, it should come as no surprise to anyone that the man currently occupying the White House is a liar and a cheat. As his niece, Mary Trump, aptly observes in her blistering tell-all memoir, “Too Much And Never Enough,” Donald Trump long ago embraced “cheating as a way of life.”

So, it comes as no great shock that Trump would attempt anything and everything to win reelection. Or more precisely, to steal another election.

Once Trump and his coterie of criminals realized that Democrats would be more likely to vote by mail this November, it was a simple and obvious choice to try and sabotage the Postal Service. With slow moving mail, many ballots might not be received on time, arriving too late to be counted. And if slowing down the mail isn’t enough on its own, simply creating a perception of problems with mail delivery could be enough to discourage some Americans from voting by mail.

While Trump’s wanting to muddle the November election by actively “kneecapping” the Post Office (Obama’s words) comes as no surprise, the fact that he has so totally messed up such a boneheaded move comes as no wonderment either.

Trump’s narcissism makes it difficult for him to understand the consequences of his actions. Yes, while slowing the mail would most likely disenfranchise many voters (more Democrats), it can’t be done without also screwing over veterans, rural communities, people waiting for their medications and social security checks, etc.

Surprisingly, yet predictively, Trump thinks voters, many in his own camp, will only notice the toll this political stunt will have on mail-in balloting!

Trump is not a thinker. He undoubtedly is not a chess player. He is a man innately bereft of the ability to see the big picture. He is notably unaware of the obvious, direct effects of a policy choice.

The smart move would have been for Trump to start his dismantling of the Post Office much later on, say in October.

Now everyone is wise to his game. And the push back has been fierce, not only from Democrats and some Republicans, but from your average Joe. Things will only get worse for Trump as his scheme unravels. 

As Joshua Holland, of Rawstory.com, puts it, “The most likely scenario is that the backlash forces Trump to back down. If not, this is the kind of thing that might eventually penetrate the media bubble Trump’s die-hard supporters inhabit. When important mail stops showing up in a timely fashion like it used to, it’s hard not to notice.”

The real scary thought in all this is what if we someday have a president as corrupt as Trump, but with at least half a brain … someone better able to pull off his crimes?

Photo | forbes.com

Charles Schwab To Supply Covid Test Kits

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Reprint from moronmajority.com*

Financial executive, Charles Schwab, founder of the Charles Schwab Corporation, has offered to supply the country with 1 million covid-19 test kits.

“There is a severe shortage of swabs,” said Schwab. “I want to help stem the spread of this deadly disease so I am buying 1 million kits and making them available to all … especially to those areas hardest hit by the virus. I know it’s a small step but it’s the least I can do.”

Schwab’s generosity has been met with great gratitude. It has also given birth to the following tongue twister:

Charles Schwab’s swabs are a small step in stemming the spread of the sickness but Schwab’s swabs seriously, and surely, will save souls

Now see if you can say that three times fast!

Photo | businessinsider.com

*moronmajority.com is a satirical site … seriously!

Trump Strategy … Throw Spaghetti At The Wall To See What Sticks

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The Trump reelection campaign has been soundly criticized as being unfocused and undisciplined. Things got so bad last month that longtime campaign manager, Brad Parscale, was ditched in favor of Bill Stepien (yes, the guy of Chris Christie “Bridgegate” fame).

Even with the big shakeup, it doesn’t appear the Trump campaign has settled on any new, comprehensive strategy to hit Biden with. There has been no reset.

Maybe Stepien has learned what Parscale already knew … you can’t stop Trump from being Trump. He will not listen to advice, no matter how sound, if it goes against what he instinctively wants to do.

So, Trump seems to always fallback on one of his favorite ploys from his ruffian playbook … the “spaghetti test” strategy. And why not? Tearing down his opponents with nasty nicknames and baseless charges has worked well for him in the past.

The idea is to come up with as many inane accusations as possible against your opponent and hope something sticks.

So far, Trump has accused Biden of:

  1. Being “Sleepy” and “Corrupt”
  2. Mishandling, along with Obama, the H1N1 pandemic
  3. Wanting to abolish the suburbs
  4. Wanting to defund the military
  5. Wanting to defund the police
  6. Wanting to abolish immigration detention
  7. Wanting to abolish educational standards
  8. Being soft on crime
  9. Being part of the “radical left”
  10. Being cozy with China
  11. Being mentally impaired
  12. Being bad for Wall Street
  13. Being a criminal who, with Obama, spied on his campaign
  14. Being a plagiarist
  15. Being a gaffe machine

Of course, this is only a partial list.

But the latest fistful of spaghetti Trump has hurled against the wall needs special mention. 

Yesterday, Trump accused the very Catholic Biden of being against religion! Incredibly, Trump suggested electing Biden would “hurt the Bible” and “hurt God.”

Unfortunately for Trump, his scattershot approach of trying to negatively define Biden isn’t working … and will not work. With only three months until election day, it is too late in the game to see what sticks and what doesn’t. People know Joe.

It seems the only thing (so far) Trump has not accused Biden of being is a pedophile (a charge, by the way, Don Jr. leveled against Biden in May!). 

Photo | inkincpr.com

The Debate Over Whether Biden Should Debate

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There is a political saying … “never get in the way of an incumbent who is digging his own grave.”

With Trump’s polling numbers getting worse by the day, the question many are asking is whether Joe Biden should agree to debate his opponent. The consensus among many political pundits seems to be that debates could only hurt Biden so why take the risk? Why give Trump a helping hand out of the deep hole he keeps digging for himself?

Former White House Press Secretary, Joe Lockhart, offered this advice to Obama’s VP, “Whatever you do, don’t debate Trump.” As he sees it, Trump “will take the truth and destroy it, and Biden will be in the position of correcting him over and over and over again. I don’t think he should give him that platform.”

Thomas Freidman of the New York Times writes, “Biden should declare that he will take part in a debate only if Trump releases his tax returns for 2016 through 2018.” This is Friedman’s way of saying there should be no debates. The odds of Trump, who has gone to extraordinary legal lengths to hide his returns, agreeing to release his tax filings conjures up an image of flying pigs.

On the flip side, some are saying Biden should definitely take on Trump.

Writing for Newsweek, Peter Roff observes, “We need to see as much of the candidates as we can …  It would be refreshing to see them go head-to-head for an hour each time on a single topic, four picked by one campaign and four picked by the other. It’s a formula for a robust discussion that will get, hopefully, at what’s on the minds of the candidates and the American people.”

Elizabeth Warren wants her former rival to debate Trump. “I know that Joe Biden will show who he is, a man of both empathy and competence, and I’d like the American people to have a chance to see that,” said Warren.

If Biden skips the debates, he does not give Trump a platform to lie to the American people as he did in 2016. He takes away Trump’s chance of improving his lot. Those who are voting for Biden won’t hold it against him. And aren’t presidential debates just elaborate made-for-TV spectacles that rarely sway voters one way or the other? In this election, opinions of the two men are pretty much baked in.

If Biden agrees to debate, yes, he gives Trump the ability to spew a bunch of lies but he’ll also give him the opportunity of making a fool of himself. A cool Joe Biden would undoubtedly get under the thin-skinned “stable genius.” Could we be treated to a, “No puppet. No puppet. You’re the puppet” 2.0? 

The bottom line is whatever Biden decides, it will be the right decision. He really can’t lose.

Photo | cnbc.com

Enough With The “What If Trump Refuses To Leave Office” Nonsense, OK?

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Articles about the possibility of Trump refusing to leave office after a November defeat are seemingly everywhere. Bill Maher, on his HBO show, Real Time, has been warning about this scenario for some time. And now, after Trump’s interview with Fox’s Chris Wallace, we have renewed interest in the possibility that Trump might hole up in the White House after being voted out on Election Day.

“I have to see,” Trump answered Wallace’s direct question as to whether he will “accept the results of the election” win or lose.

Here’s the thing. It is not up to Trump to accept or reject the election results.

If he loses the vote, Trump will no longer be president as of January 20, 2021. Because the president immediately and automatically surrenders his constitutional authority when his term expires, he would lack the power to direct the U.S. Secret Service or other federal authorities to protect him. 

Sure, if Trump could get away with refusing to leave the Oval Office, he undoubtedly would try. But he can’t.

Fred Kaplan, in an article for Slate.com, clearly explains what would happen after a Trump defeat:

On the dot of noon [January 20, 2021], the nuclear codes, which currently allow Trump to order and authenticate a nuclear attack, expire. The officer who has been following him around everywhere with the “football”—which, contrary to popular belief, is not a button or a palm print but rather a book filled with various launch codes—leaves. If Trump and whatever lackeys stay with him prevent the officer from leaving, another officer, holding a backup football, would join Biden at the inauguration ceremony.

By the same token, the entire U.S. military establishment will pivot away from ex-President Trump and salute President Biden. The principle of civilian control is hammered into American officers from the time they’re cadets—and the 20thAmendment of the Constitution states, “The terms of the President and Vice President shall end at noon on the 20th day of January”—no ifs, ands, or buts.

If Trump orders the military to do anything, they will refuse his order. If any officers obey his order—say, to circle the White House to keep him in power—they would certainly be tried and convicted on charges of mutiny and sedition, and they would know this before taking the leap.

Meanwhile, the Secret Service will abandon Trump, as they do every president whose term is up, except for a small detail assigned to protect him and his family for the rest of their lives.

Overseas, foreign leaders will cut off relations with the U.S. ambassadors in their capitals and await instructions from Biden or his acting secretary of state.

Meanwhile, Biden’s acting attorney general will have drawn up arrest warrants for Donald J. Trump and anyone who remains at his side on charges—at minimum—of criminal trespassing. If Trump calls on the armed forces or militias or the nation’s sheriffs to come defend him, he might also be charged with incitement or insurrection.

Yes, there are a lot of things to worry about each day Trump remains in the White House (especially between a November defeat and a January inauguration). But his refusing to leave office after a loss is not one of them.

Photo | inquisitir.com

Leader Of Mask-Less Covidiots Finally Dons Mask In Public

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More than three months after health officials from his own government recommended all Americans cover their faces when social distancing was not possible, Donald Trump donned a mask in public.

Trump was pretty much “forced” to wear a mask while visiting wounded soldiers at Maryland’s Walter Reed National Military Medical Center last week. 

As he is the leader of the group many now refer to as the “Mask-Less Covidiots,” Trump made it clear to his followers this was a unique situation, implying we might not see such a common sense effort to slow the spread of COVID-19 coming from him again anytime soon.

“I think when you’re in a hospital, especially in that particular setting where you’re talking to a lot of soldiers and people that in some cases just got off the operating table, I think it’s a great thing to wear a mask,” Trump said. “I’ve never been against masks but I do believe they have a time and a place.”

According to nearly every healthcare professional, the “time and place” to wear masks in public is … always and everywhere! At least for the foreseeable future.

Even as the virus spreads once again out of control across the country, neither Trump nor Pence, who ostensibly heads the U.S. coronavirus  response, feel it’s necessary to issue a federal mandate to wear masks in public. As Pence sees it, while wearing masks is a good idea, the White House wants to “defer to governors” on whether or not to order people to cover their faces in public!

Because of this inexcusable federal inaction, the Mask-Less Covidiots have been making their presence felt throughout the country, the most recent onslaught coming this past weekend at a grilled cheese bar and restaurant in Windemere, Florida.

Florida, the state that reported a record increase of more than 15,000 new cases of COVID-19 in 24-hours this past Sunday.

Of course, Florida, unlike some other states, does not have a statewide mask requirement as its governor, Ron DeSantis, is a loyal foot soldier in Trump’s Mask-Less Covidiots brigade.

Photo | abcnews.com/AP/patrick semansky

Mind-blowing Scenario … Trump-Trump 2020!

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While Donald Trump may not be able to read tea leaves, his campaign team certainly can. They see certain defeat in November for their boss if current polling trends are not reversed.

One of the most talked-about scenarios for shaking things up is for Trump to dump Pence in favor of a more compelling running mate … say, a woman. Say, Nikki Haley?

The idea of Trump matching Biden, who has pledged to pick a woman as his running mate, makes a whole lot of sense. But Haley?

Why not Ivanka?

Let’s play this out.

Trump convinces Pence to resign for the good of the GOP. He chooses Ivanka to be his new VP.

The Trump-Trump ticket would add instant excitement to a reelection campaign that is stuck in the mire and heading for what some are predicting a landslide defeat.

If the Trump-Trump ticket wins, it’s all good.

If the father-daughter tag team loses in November, also all good.

After the November defeat, Donald Trump resigns the presidency, making Ivanka president. She then pardons her father of all crimes committed in the past or in the future, while in office or out of office … basically a pardon in perpetuity! (I know this is not possible but Ivanka is a Trump. The law doesn’t apply to Trumps, remember?)

In the meantime, now president Ivanka picks her husband, Jared Kushner, as her VP, to serve out the rest of the term. The two then siphon off as much money as possible from the national treasury before leaving office in January 2021.  Yes, Don Jr. would throw a fit being passed over for VP.  At least Eric wouldn’t mind.

Having been pardoned for all possible crimes, Trump spends his days golfing and setting up his new cable network, TrumpTV.

The stated goal of TrumpTV will be to replace Fox News as the number one source for conservative disinformation, conspiracy theories, etc. and “to make Biden a one-term president.” 

Of course, Ivanka and Jared would be free to run again in 2024.

Ok. This sounds crazy but is it any crazier than a country electing a mentally deficient, reality TV con man to the most powerful office in the world?

Photo | hollywoodreporter.com

Trump Isn’t Running Against Biden … He’s Running Against Himself

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Donald Trump’s reelection chances are looking flimsier by the day.

The latest nationwide New York Times/Siena College poll has Biden ahead by 14 points. What’s even worse, the same polling has Trump losing to Biden in many of the crucial swing states … 47%-36% in Michigan, 49%-38% in Wisconsin, 50%-40% in Pennsylvania, 47%-41% in Florida, 48%-41% in Arizona and 49%-40% in North Carolina. 

So, Joe Biden is a great candidate, a great campaigner, right?

No, not really. He is pretty much keeping a low profile these days, allowing Trump’s self-destructiveness to keep propelling him forward. And, most likely, Biden will stick to that strategy for a while longer. What’s the saying, “If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it?”

As Janet Hook and Evan Halper recently wrote in the LA Times, “Voters are not so much upbeat about him [Biden] as they are upset with Trump.”

Though Trump has tried to make the race about Biden and his faults, he has failed miserably. His campaign has already spent tens of millions on attack ads that have fizzled – tying Biden to that Trumpian concoction, “Obamagate” and, of course, to Ukraine funny business. 

Finding that the right’s culture war playbook is proving less convincing against a white male target, Fox News is stepping into the breach.

As Matt Gertz writes in the National Memo, “They have started claiming that this fall’s election isn’t really about the relative merits of Trump and Biden. Instead, they have turned Biden — the septuagenarian center-left liberal who capped four decades in public service as Barack Obama’s vice president and speaks movingly about loss, grief, and the need for reconciliation on the campaign trail — into a stand-in for dark forces poised to shatter civilization.”

Here is what Fox’s Tucker Carlson said recently in one of his monologues:

“We should stop pretending that this is an election between Donald Trump and Joe Biden. There is no Joe Biden; the Joe Biden you remember no longer exists. The candidate has no independent thoughts of his own. He has no core beliefs. He is empty. He’s a perfect Trojan horse.”

With his chances for November continuing to slide, like on that “slippery” West Point ramp, look for Trump to shake up his reelection team any day now. Of course, this won’t make any difference or change the dynamics of the race. Trump’s problem is Trump.

As William Galston, a Brookings Institute scholar, succinctly put it, “Right now the election is Trump versus Trump, and Trump is losing badly.” 

Photo | cnn.com

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