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You are here: Home / Archives for John DeProspo

Don’t Blame Trump, or Republicans, For The Mess We’re In

October 13, 2021 By John DeProspo 5 Comments

It is no exaggeration, our democracy is hanging by a thread, being tested like never before. Four years of the most corrupt, and incompetent, president in our nation’s history … along with a political party that failed to remove him from office when it had the chance, twice, … will do that.

For those who thought once Trump was voted out of office things would get back to normal, you weren’t paying attention. For those who thought Republicans would come to their senses once Captain Chaos was stripped of his power, you never understood the sheer evil of Mitch McConnell and his band of obstructionists.

But here’s the thing. Trump and his seditionist Republicans are today threatening our democracy as a direct result of two monumentally bad decisions by the Roberts Court.

First came Citizens United.

In a 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court held that corporations are people with First Amendment rights and their money is free speech. This decision reversed century-old campaign finance restrictions and unleashed floods of dark money to corrupt our politics and foul our democracy. As former president Jimmy Carter put it, this ruling was nothing short of “legalized bribery.”

Then came Shelby County v. Holder.

In another 5-4 decision, the Supreme Court gutted the Voting Rights Act of 1965, a law that required certain states with a history of discrimination against minority voters to get changes cleared by the federal government before they went into effect. Writing for the majority, Chief Justice Roberts wrote there was no longer any need for the law because, since the law’s enactment, “things have changed dramatically.” That racial discrimination had come to an end was news to many Americans, especially black Americans.

Within days of the Court’s decision, states that were covered by the Voting Rights Act began to enact new voting restrictions. Who could have seen that!

Elections have consequences. Donald Trump, in one term, nominated three young Supreme Court justices to lifetime appointments, giving the conservative bloc a 6-3 majority.

It’s hard to think that because of the new far-right conservatives on the bench, John Roberts is today considered a moderate! (OK, moderate conservative).

We know beyond a doubt that Trump, and his rabid base, does not believe in democracy. We know today’s Republicans do not take seriously their sworn oath to the Constitution, if they ever did.

When that decisive case comes before the Supreme Court, the one determining whether democracy lives or dies, what will it be for the Court’s conservatives?  Will it be partisanship over country, like it is for those who put them in power? 

I can’t help thinking of that other disastrous Supreme Court decision … Bush v. Gore.

Photo | scroll.in

Filed Under: featured, Opinion

Cyber Ninjas Hires Bill Barr To Summarize Arizona Audit Report

September 25, 2021 By John DeProspo 4 Comments

Reprint from moronmajority.com

In an effort to stem the confusion surrounding the release of its Arizona audit report, Cyber Ninjas has hired former Trump Attorney General, William Barr, to distill the essential findings.

At a news conference this morning, Barr said, “While the audit showed Biden receiving more votes than Trump, that doesn’t necessarily mean Biden won the contest. Some are actually claiming the report ‘conclusively shows there were enough fraudulent votes, mystery votes, and fake votes to change the outcome of the election 4 or 5 times over’.” 

Arizona Republicans are not happy with the work of Cyber Ninjas and are said to be contemplating another audit of the Maricopa County election results to be conducted by the little-known firm, Sumo Warriors.

Photo | people.com

*moronmajority.com is a satirical site … seriously!

Filed Under: featured, satire Tagged With: Arizona, audit report, Bill Barr, cyber ninjas, Donald Trump, elections, Maricopa County, satire, William Barr

Did They All Lie?

September 5, 2021 By John DeProspo 8 Comments

Did you think this would turn out any other way?

“As a general proposition I understand the importance of the precedent set forth in Roe v. Wade.” – Brett Kavanaugh at his Senate confirmation hearing.

Did you really think there was another David Souter among the Three “Trump-appointed” Stooges?

“The Supreme Court of the United States has held in Roe v. Wade that a fetus is not a person for purposes of the Fourteenth Amendment. That’s the law of the land. I accept the law of the land, senator, yes.” – Neil Gorsuch at his Senate confirmation hearing.

Did you actually believe the “moderate” John Roberts would be able to convince at least one Trump jurist to honor the Constitution he or she swore to uphold?

 “I can’t pre-commit or say, yes, I’m going in with some agenda, because I’m not, I don’t have any agenda. I have an agenda to stick to the rule of law and decide cases as they come.” – Amy Coney Barrett at her Senate confirmation hearing.

Today’s ultra-right-wing Court was never going to issue an injunction against the radical anti-abortion law passed in Texas just like the three Trump nominees where never going to reveal their true feelings about Roe v. Wade and protecting a woman’s right to choose.

I like to believe that Sen. Susan Collins was duped by Kavanaugh’s reassurance that he did not pose a threat to Roe v. Wade’s protections for women and families. But that would be giving Collins too much credit. She had to know what Kavanaugh was all about … and he, along with the other two Trump-appointed ideologues, Gorsuch and Coney Barrett, did not disappoint the anti-abortion forces.

My only hope is now that this so-called “supreme court” has shown its hand (at least on the abortion issue), the backlash will be fierce and unrelenting.

A majority of Americans support a women’s right to choose. Let’s pray that the Republicans up for reelection in the 2022 midterms, those who support the Court’s recent action, all suffer defeat. Let’s hope the Democrats hold their majority in the House and increase their majority in the Senate … and that “Supreme Court reform” (i.e., increasing the number of justices to blunt the Court’s extreme conservative tilt) is at the top of any new legislative agenda.

Photo | cnn.com

Filed Under: featured, Opinion Tagged With: abortion rights, Amy Coney Barrett, Brett Kavanaugh, lie, Neil Gorsuch, Roe v. Wade, senate confirmation hearing, Supreme Court, Susan Collins

Anti-Vaxxers Are Literally Dying To “Own The Libs”

August 25, 2021 By John DeProspo 8 Comments

Is there anything more enjoyable to Republicans than to “own the libs”? Oh, how they love to mock, infuriate or just get under the skin of those snooty liberals with their awesome, uncompromising conservatism!

To “own” someone is to dominate and humiliate them, and the “libs,” as described by Rolling Stone magazine, can loosely be defined as “anyone to the left of Sean Hannity.”

“Owning the libs” became a mantra of conservatism long before Trump came along. But since Trump’s ascension to the White House, to “own the libs” is less an identifiable act or set of policy goals than an ethos … a way of life; a civic religion, if you will.

Unfortunately for those who refuse to get vaccinated (predominantly Republicans of the red state variety), with the arrival of the coronavirus, “owning the libs” has taken a deadly turn.

I’m sure you’ve seen videos of those anti-vaxxers hooked up to respirators proudly claiming they do not regret not getting their vaccine shot. Heck it’s all about personal freedom, isn’t it, they tell you.

So now the “if liberals are for it, I’m against” line of thinking (I use the word loosely) has resulted in some Republicans actually accepting death over ever admitting they were wrong?

God help those poor, lost souls!

Interestingly, Urbandictionary.com defines “owning the libs” as: To inflict significant harm upon oneself, or significantly benefit the libs, out of a misguided attempt at spite. 

Perhaps Ralph Waldo Emerson said it best, “A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds.” 

If Emerson were around in today’s Covid-19 world, he might have added, ”and it could kill you.”

Photo| nydailynews.com

Filed Under: featured, politics Tagged With: "Owning the libs", anti-vaxxers, covid-19, death, foolish consistency, Republicans, vaccine shot

Despite Evidence To The Contrary, Ron DeSantis Tries To Assure Floridians “All Is Well”

August 2, 2021 By John DeProspo 6 Comments

Taking a page from a character in National Lampoon’s Animal House, Florida governor Ron DeSantis is attempting convince the good people of his state that the recent spike in Covid-19 cases is nothing to be worried about. 

“It’s a seasonal virus and this is the seasonal pattern it follows in the Sun Belt states,” DeSantis told reporters at a press conference about one week ago. He also said that he expects Covid cases to decline soon. 

He might as well be telling his fellow Floridians to “Remain calm. All is well.”

If you remember, “Remain calm. All is well” are the immortal words uttered by Kevin Bacon during the climax of Animal House, as his character – the Delta Tau Chi antagonist, Chip Diller – helplessly attempts to address a fleeing mob of shrieking parade-goers. 

Today the Florida Hospital Association reported 10,389 Covid-19 hospitalizations, the most statewide during any point in the pandemic. This follows Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reporting over the weekend that Florida had more than 21,000 new coronavirus infections on Friday. It was the highest one-day total for the state, which now makes up roughly one and five new cases nationally.

As Florida’s coronavirus infections continue to spike, public health officials and local elected leaders have urged DeSantis to take more drastic measures to get the virus under control. DeSantis, however, has stubbornly maintained a strict “no-mandate” approach to the virus, including touting an executive order last week that prohibits districts from requiring masks in schools. He also vowed to fight any city or municipality that tries to institute Covid restrictions, including mask mandates or lockdowns.

DeSantis has been sucking up to Donald Trump, and his loyal base, ever since the start of the pandemic, downplaying the severity of the virus, in hopes of furthering his presidential ambitions.

If cases continue to soar in Florida will people remain accepting of DeSantis, or will this preventable surge, a direct result De Santis’s failed leadership, crush his dreams for 2024?

Things did not work out well for Kevin Bacon.

Photo | Butler Street Consulting

Filed Under: featured, politics Tagged With: All is well, Animal House, coronavirus, covid-19, Florida, Ron DeSantis, surge

Our Interview With That “College Educated Wite Suburian Woman”

July 26, 2021 By John DeProspo 4 Comments

After making a splash across social media, we at The Daily Nooze decided to interview the woman who so proudly displays her love for Donald Trump across the back of her Jag.

While she agreed to answer our questions, she declined an in-person interview as she really didn’t have the time, working three part-time jobs and all. She instead requested we email her our questions and she would incorporate her answers into a written response.

 Here is her reply:

Yes, I am college educated and I voted for Trump … twice. I am shore he won the last election and that Biden is an inposter president. I care so much about our country that I marched in a number of “Stop The Steel” rallies in my hometown.

I am the first person in my family to ern a college degree. I truly believe in the benefits of hire education.

I know that President Trump said he especially likes the poorly educated but I think education is the only way for someone from humble beginnings, like me, to get a head.

I grew up in a small farming town in Georgia and moved to the big city (population 1500) witch was 30 miles away when I turned 18.

I am a proud graduate of Tuberville State University in Alabama (Let’s Go Fighting Cicadas!) and hope President Trump is reinstituted next month just like Mr. Lindell said he would.

“If you think education is expensive, try ignorance” – Derek Bok

Filed Under: featured, satire Tagged With: college educated, satire, Trump supporter, Wite suburian female

Dr. Fauci Hits Dr. Paul With A Respectful “Va Fungool”

July 21, 2021 By John DeProspo 4 Comments

He couldn’t take any more nonsense coming from the eye doctor at yesterday’s congressional hearing on the coronavirus pandemic. 

The man who has advised seven Presidents on HIV/AIDS and many other domestic and global health issues; the man who is universally recognized as a leading immunologist, esteemed clinician and dedicated administrator in his position as Chief of the Laboratory of Immunoregulation and as Director of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases basically told Rand Paul to go f*** himself.

 “Senator Paul, you do not know what you’re talking about, quite frankly. And I want to say that officially. You do not know what you are talking about” responded Fauci after the Kentucky ophthalmologist, turned U.S. Senator, accused Fauci of lying to Congress. 

Fauci continued, “If anybody is lying here, senator, it is you.”

Of course, Paul’s attack on the good doctor had nothing to do with facts and everything to do with playing to an audience on the right, where Fauci has been turned into a political punching bag by conservative media and subjected to “lock him up!” chants at Trump rallies.

The hapless Dr. Paul from Bowling Green, Kentucky, known for his anti-science stances, learned a lesson ‘bout a-messin with a feisty man … if you attack a kid from Brooklyn, New York, be prepared to have your arse handed to you.

Screenshot | abcnews.com

Filed Under: featured, politics Tagged With: Anthony Fauci, congressional hearing, coronavirus, Dr. Fauci, Dr. Paul, heated exchange, lying, Rand Paul

The GOP Has Irredeemably Gone To POT

July 14, 2021 By John DeProspo 3 Comments

Funny, but there are still some pundits talking about the civil war within the Republican Party.

We read stories of how Liz Cheney and Adam Kinzinger (along with a few other so-called Republican “moderates”) are standing up for traditional conservative values against the Trump nihilists within their beloved party.

The truth is there is no longer a Republican Party. Whatever war there was is over. The GOP has become the POT (Party of Trump).

What’s that you say Mitt and Lisa … you are not members of the POT? You do not worship at the feet of the Orange Calf? You say now that Trump is no longer sitting in the White House his influence over your party will fade?

Please wake up and smell the insurrection. You cannot continue to call yourselves Republicans while remaining members of the POT.

You two sensible lawmakers need to immediately and dramatically renounce your party affiliation. 

No, you do not have to go full Arlen Specter, the longtime Republican who switched to the Democratic Party in 2009 after saying he increasingly found himself “at odds with the Republican philosophy.”

All you have to do is declare as independents and caucus with the Democrats.

Surely you see what’s at stake?  Our very democracy is being threatened by an avalanche of voter suppression laws coming out of Republican-controlled states. You have been shown by our right-wing Supreme Court that it will not save the day.

But you can!

Your “Republican” colleagues are interested in only one thing … power. I honestly do not believe that applies to you. Show your fellow Americans, and the world, what true patriots you are by helping to pass federal voter protection legislation!

You will forever be revered for your acts of decency and bravery.  You will have separated yourselves from those POT asskissers who are hellbent on putting an end to our 250-year experiment with democracy.

As any good attorney would caution you … time is of the essence.

Photo | foxnews.com

Filed Under: featured, Opinion Tagged With: GOP, independents, Lisa Murkowski, Mitt Romney, Party of Trump, POT, renounce, Republicans, voter protection

Giuliani Prepares For New Role As MyPillow Pitchman

June 27, 2021 By John DeProspo 4 Comments

Reprint from moronmajority.com

Now that his New York law license has been suspended, and facing likely disbarment, Rudy Giuliani can rest easy at night … the “My Pillow Guy,” Mike Lindell, has rescued him from impending financial ruin. Rudy Giuliani will be the new mug in MyPillow commercials.

The former top federal prosecutor and twice-elected New York mayor will be hawking Lindell’s wares on late night cable shows and right-wing media outlets.

“Rudy is a perfect fit for our pillows,” said Lindell. “He has a high approval rating with our typical buyers, people over the age of 75 and the mentally impaired.”

Looking to tap into Giuliani’s recent notoriety, Lindell will be offering a new pillow cover resistant to hair dye.

Some are saying the two staunch Trump supporters were meant to do business together. Giuliani, a Roman Catholic, however, has told Lindell he refuses to wear a giant crucifix around his neck, a Lindell trademark.

Photo | cnn.com

*moronmajority.com is a satirical site … seriously!

Filed Under: featured, satire

Ronny Jackson Backs Off Demand For Biden To Take Cognitive Test

June 18, 2021 By John DeProspo 3 Comments

Reprint from moronmajority.com

After accusing Joe Biden of suffering from “mental impairment,” Donald Trump’s former personal doctor and current Texas congressman, Rep. Ronny Jackson, is no longer demanding the President take a test to measure his cognitive abilities. 

It appears Biden has agreed to the request if Jackson consents to a sobriety test.

Photo | businessinsider.com

*moronmajority.com is a satirical site … seriously!

Filed Under: featured, satire Tagged With: cognitive test, Joe Biden, Ronny Jackson, satire, sobriety test

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