As Donald Trump settles in for his 17-day vacation at his New Jersey golf club, he is making sure the American public is aware his vacation is not really a vacay.

“Working in Bedminster, N.J., as long planned construction is being done at the White House. This is not a vacation – meetings and calls!” tweeted our hardworking commander in chief.

The president’s aides are calling the upcoming golf marathon a “working vacation.”

One senior White House member, who chose to remain anonymous, described how Trump would be hitting the links while still conducting the people’s business.

“The president will be surrounding himself with senior advisors while knocking that little white ball around his property,” said the aide.

“Take today’s round, for example,” the aide offered. ”To the ordinary observer, it appeared the president and his caddy were discussing which club to use on his approach shot to the second green. But, no, he and his son-in-law, Jared Kushner, who will be acting as the president’s personal caddy throughout his stay, were actually discussing Jared’s new plan for Middle East peace.”

“On hole number five, when the president shanked his drive into the woods, the fifteen minutes spent by the president and Jared looking for the ball was really a discussion about the infrastructure legislation the president plans to push when he gets back to D.C.”

After his rounds of golf, the president plans to have dinner at the club’s highly-rated restaurant.

Kellyanne Conway, one of Trump’s most loyal surrogates, will be acting as his personal waitress.

At his first dinner last night, Conway was overheard not only recommending the president go with the fresh brook trout over a mound of sautéed spinach but also suggesting the president appoint Stephen Miller the new White House communications director.

No, despite what the mainstream media wants you to think about Trump’s two+ week furlough, the president will still be on the clock working hard to deliver on the many promises he made to the American people.

Thanks to Trump’s efforts, the term “working vacation” is no longer an oxymoron. It is just an expression believed by morons.

Photo | nydailynews.com

Yes– this could be fake news!

Attorney General Jeff Sessions, the top law enforcement officer in the country, has just hired a personal lawyer.

Sessions now joins a long list of officials in the Trump administration to hire personal counsel over the Russia scandal that Donald Trump continues to call a “hoax”, a “witch hunt” and “fake news.”

To the casual observer, it seems strange that the president would himself hire multiple lawyers to privately represent him if there is no “there” there.

While this trend of “lawyering up” is sure to continue as the Mueller investigation into all things Trump-Russia heats up in the days ahead, here is a list of Trump officials that have made the decision to hire there own mouthpieces:

1. Vice President Mike Pence
2. Advisor Michael Flynn
3. Campaign manager Paul Manafort
4. Trump’s personal lawyer Michael Cohen
5. Advisor Roger Stone
6. Advisor Carter Page
7. Advisor Michael Caputo
8. Son-in-law Jared Kushner
9. Daughter Ivanka Trump

It was only last month, while speaking in the East Room, Trump once again flatly denied any connection with the Russians during the 2016 presidential election.

“The entire thing has been a witch hunt,” Trump said. “There’s no collusion between, certainly, myself and my campaign — but I can only speak for myself — and the Russians — zero.”

Note the qualifier!

As more Trump administration officials realize it is in their best interest to hire a personal lawyer to represent them in the deepening and broadening investigation, they can take comfort in the fact that one of the best criminal lawyers in the country is still available for hire … Saul Goodman.

Photos | amc.com/Sony Pictures Home Entertainment

Now that Melania Trump has finally moved from her gilded Fifth Avenue tower to live with her husband in Washington D.C., people are anxious to know her thoughts on living in the White House.

The First Lady was kind enough to grant The Daily Nooze an interview.

TDN: “First Lady Melania, thank you for granting us this exclusive interview. First question, how does it feel to be back with your husband?”

First Lady: “Oh, very tremendous. This house is amazing. So much history and character.”

TDN: “Do you have any plans for redecorating the master bedroom?”

First Lady: “Nyet … I mean, no. I will be sleeping in Lincoln Bedroom while Donald will sleep in master bedroom.”

TDN: “I must say many people will be surprised to hear this. It will further fuel gossip that you and the President are not getting along.”

First Lady: “Oh, no. That is fake news. I just have taste for things antique, that’s all. Ask any of my friends, they will tell you. I love old things. Just like my Donald. He turned a happy 71 yesterday.”

TDN: “But the fact is the two of you will be sleeping apart. People will talk.”

First Lady: “I do not care what people think or say. Donald and me are very fine. We lived apart the last five months and we both were very happy.”

TDN:” Besides the historical ambiance, why is the Lincoln bedroom so special to you?”

First Lady: “Oh, many reasons. But biggest is thrill of sleeping in the same bed as a great president. What a tremendous feeling! You know Mr. Lincoln he freed the slaves.”

At that point in the interview, the president’s chief of staff, Reince Priebus, stepped in, pulled the First Lady aside and ended the discussion.

First Lady, “I say something wrong, Reincy. No?”

Unfortunately, there was no time to ask First Lady Melania about her pet project: easing the suffering and heartache of high school valedictorians that are rejected by their first-choice Ivy League schools.

Photo | nytimes/Ken Cedeno/Corbis

Yes – this article might be fake … well, some parts!

Reprint from MoronMajority.com (warning this could be a fake news site)

The election of Donald J. Trump as our nation’s 45th president has not only had a profound effect on both our national and international politics, but it has also impacted what we call our children.

In the most recent survey of baby names conducted by Field and Stream, the top three boys and girls names are all Trump inspired.

The most popular baby girl name is now Kellyanne, in honor of Donald Trump’s former campaign manager and now presidential advisor, Kellyanne Conway. It seems American parents are impressed with Conway’s sticktoitiveness in defending the president at all costs no matter how ridiculous or absurd that endeavor may be.

Coming in second, as might be expected, is Ivanka. Trump’s daughter, and wife of Jared Kushner, is beloved by many new mothers for her poise and grace. Plus she scores points among sentimentalists for having converted to Judaism in order to marry the love of her life.

In third place for most popular baby girl names, for some inexplicable reason, is the name Eric. As you may know, Eric is the name of Donald Trump’s second eldest son.

On the boys’ side of the ledger, the new most popular baby boy name is Michael or Mike (Mick). This comes as no surprise as the name figures prominently in the Trump Administration. Mike is the name of Trump’s vice president, Mike Pence. It is also the name of three current or former cabinet members: Mike Flynn, Mike Pompeo and Mick Mulvaney.

Surprisingly, the second most popular name for baby boys is Reince, the first name of the former chairman of the Republican National Committee and Trump’s current chief of staff.

Even more interesting is that the number three name on the list of boy names is Priebus, Reince’s surname!

Of course the popularity of baby names is subject to popular whims and vagaries. Many are seeing the current popularity of Trump inspired names as an aberration … a flash in the pan. Most people who follow such trends predict we will soon be getting back to names like Emma, Olivia and Sophia, for girls, and names like Liam, Noah and Mason, for boys, once Trump steps down (impeached?) from office.

Photo | bizpacreview.com

Proving once again why satire is so difficult with Trump in the White House, the Trump Organization, a group synonymous with glitz and glamour, has announced it will be opening a chain of budget-friendly hotels under the name American Idea.

The brainchild is the work of the Trump boys, Eric and Don Jr. Apparently they got the inspiration for getting into the cheap-accommodations business while traveling though rural America during their father’s presidential campaign.

When Eric Danziger, chief executive of the company’s hotels division, heard the idea, he called it “brilliant.”

“The reality is we should have something in those kinds of locations,” said Danziger.

The company plans to open its first three American Idea hotels in deep-red Mississippi.

Following a tried and try business model, the Trump boys will get local real estate developments and investors to put up the money to build the hotels.

While rates for the new inexpensive Trump hotels are still unknown, the question is will they be significantly low enough to compete with true budget chains like Motel 6 or Days Inn?

Sensing their predicament, the astute Trump boys realized design would be an important feature in attracting rural folk to their new chain. They’ve stated their goal is to make the hotel experience seen more like home for what many are calling their redneck clientele.

Now the Trump Organization has offered a preview of what the hotel chain will look like. Many in the hotel business are calling the architectural design “a winner.”

In an effort to further stand out among a crowed field of cheap lodgings, the Trumps have announced the hotels will accept old Confederate money.

(AP Photo/John Locher)

OK – Some of this article may be fake!