My entire life I’ve been told fast food is bad for you. Doctor after doctor has admonished me about the evils of Big Macs. But thanks to you, Mr. Trump, I now know this has all been just one big conspiracy concocted by the medical-industrial complex.
Everyone makes fun of your love of Happy Meals and Kentucky Fried Chicken. People say you are a heart attack in the making. They laugh at your girth. They criticize you for your lack of exercise.
But you, sir, have exposed the truth. All that talk about eating more fruits and vegetables is baloney. Getting 20-30 minutes of exercise each day is a bunch of hooey.
I applaud the courage of your White House doctor, Ronny Jackson, for exposing the big “ healthy eating” lie.
Far from being the out-of-shape individual your critics say you are, Dr. Jackson has made it clear you’re in “excellent health” and “ absolutely fit for duty.”
Dr. Jackson has confirmed what your New York physician, Dr. Harold Bornstein, said during your presidential run… that if you were to win the presidency, you would be the “healthiest individual ever elected.”
Did you know that at 6’3” and 239 pounds your height and weight is almost equal to that of New York Giants tight end Evan Engram (6’3” 240 lbs.)? Truly excellent!
You, sir, are an inspiration for all us junk food addicts.
Now I understand what gives you your vigor and stamina. It’s undoubtedly all that fried chicken, pizza, burgers and fries you eat on a regular basis.
I understand that part of your amazing health is due, as Dr, Jackson noted, to your “incredible genes” but I’ll follow your diet.
Not only will I keep emulating your eating habits but I am giving up my health insurance, Why do I need to pay outrageous premiums to see doctors who lie to me about what constitutes a good diet?
Thank you, Mr. Trump, for shattering another “fake news” myth about the dangers of fast food.
Junk food is good food!
Photo | cnn.com