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Trump Demands Weather Service Retract Its Weekend Forecast

June 10, 2020 By John DeProspo 3 Comments

Reprint from moronmajority.com

Donald Trump has asked the National Weather Service to retract its weekend forecast calling for rain as it would interfere with his golf plans.

“I hate playing in the rain,” said Trump. “I’ll admit it, I’m not a mudder.”

Trump has a long history of attacking any news source that gives him bad news. Earlier today, his campaign demanded CNN apologize for reporting on a poll that shows Biden beating him badly.

The National Weather Service (NWS) is the official weather bureau of the United States, founded on February 9, 1870.

Sources at the bureau have refused comment.

Photo | businessinsider.com

Filed Under: featured, satire Tagged With: CNN poll, Donald Trump, golf, National Weather Service, rain, satire

Which One Is The Golf Addict?

May 6, 2018 By John DeProspo 2 Comments

According to the Independent, Donald Trump plays golf almost three times as much as Barack Obama. That’s the same Donald Trump who promised voters, “I’m not gonna play much golf because there’s a lot of work to be done.”

Obama played a total of 333 rounds of golf during his 8 years as president. According to Trumpgolfcount.com, Trump has already hit the links 105 times in 1  1/3 years in office… at a cost of over $65 million to John Q. Public.

Like so many Trump lies told to his gullible supporters during the presidential campaign, the “no golf” whopper is a real doozy. It is like the “hole-in-one” of lies… a spectacular feat!

Photo | news.sky.com

Filed Under: featured, politics Tagged With: "no golf", Barack Obama, compare, Donald Trump, golf, golf addict, who plays more

Now That He’s “Totally Vindicated,” Trump Goes Golfing

February 4, 2018 By John DeProspo Leave a Comment

The heat is off. The fat lady has sung. The Trump-Russia investigation will soon be no more.

At least that is what we are lead to believe by Donald Trump after the release of the “explosive” Nunes memo.

Referring to himself in the third person, Trump tweeted yesterday:

This memo totally vindicates “Trump” in probe. But the Russian Witch Hunt goes on and on. Their was no Collusion and there was no Obstruction (the word now used because, after one year of looking endlessly and finding NOTHING, collusion is dead). This is an American disgrace!

Even Donald Jr. is breathing a sigh of relief!

“There is a little bit of sweet revenge in it for me and certainly probably the family in a sense that if they wouldn’t have done this, this stuff would be going on,” said Junior on Trump TV (also known as Fox News).

And boy will Junior (and anyone else caught up in the Mueller investigation) save money! He complained on Fox about the “millions in legal fees” he had to pay in connection with the Russia probe, the time he’s had to waste and “being smeared throughout the media for a year.”

Unfortunately, the only people who believe the partisan Nunes memo marks the end of Special Prosecutor Robert Mueller’s probe are the Trumps and their diehard supporters.

The FBI, under the direction of Trump’s own appointee, Christopher Wray, issued the following statement regarding the infamous memo:

With regard to the House Intelligence Committee’s memorandum, the FBI was provided a limited opportunity to review this memo the day before the committee voted to release it. As expressed during our initial review, we have grave concerns about material omissions of fact that fundamentally impact the memo’s accuracy.

Unless Trump uses the memo as an excuse to fire him, look for Mueller and his team to religiously plow forward in their search for the truth concerning Trump-Russia collusion and obstruction of justice.

At the very least, Trump and family had an enjoyable, albeit delusional, weekend.

Photo | horsesmouth.typepad.com

 

 

Filed Under: featured, Opinion Tagged With: Devin Nunes, Donald Jr., Donald Trump, fat lady, FBI, golf, investigation, Junior, memo, probe, Robert Mueller, vindication

Trump Challenges Kim Jong-un To A Game Of Golf

September 12, 2017 By John DeProspo Leave a Comment

In an effort to de-escalate tensions between their respective countries, Donald Trump has invited North Korean leader, Kim Jong-un, to a friendly game of golf at his Mar-a-Lago resort.

“I’ve always said some of my best deals have been negotiated on the golf course,” boasted Trump. “The fake news media gives me such a hard time with all the golf I’ve played as president. What they don’t tell the American people is that I’m actually working while I’m golfing.”

The idea of using sports to improve relations with an adversary is not new.

When Richard Nixon sought a thaw in American relations with China in the early 1970s, he resorted to table tennis. In what later came to be known as “Ping Pong” diplomacy, the two countries that had not had diplomatic or economic relations for nearly 20 years, finally broke the ice. Nixon’s gambit turned out to be successful, resulting in opening the U.S.-China relationship and leading the U.S. to lift its embargo against the People’s Republic of China on June 10, 1971.

Already Trump’s attempt to find common ground with North Korea through the game of golf is being called “Fairway Finesse.”

Someone on the White House staff brought up the fact that there is only one golf course in North Korea and Kim is not known to be a player. Wouldn’t Trump, a lifelong golfer, embarrass a man who has probably never held a golf club?

“That’s nonsense,” snapped Trump. “From all I hear Kim is a natural athlete, like his father Kim Jong-il. I heard Kim is a big hockey fan … that he played a secret exhibition game with some of the NHL’s biggest stars and notched a Gordie Howe hat trick in his first time on the ice. And he did it while playing goalie!”

Legend has it the elder Kim was perhaps the greatest athlete of his time. It is well documented he shot five holes-in-one in his first try at golf, only to be followed by a perfect 300 game in bowling … on the same day!

Whether Kim takes Trump up on his offer remains to be seen. But, in an encouraging sign,  it is being reported that the legendary golf instructor, Butch Harmon, will be accompanying Kim’s good friend, Dennis Rodman, on his visit to North Korea next week.

The Pentagon, as the entire world, is hoping Kim accepts Trump’s invitation so that our skilled golfer and negotiator-in-chief can work his magic in getting North Korea to give up its nuclear program, making our world that much safer.

Asked for further comment, Trump said, “We’ll see what happens.”

Photo | express.co.uk

Caution – this could be fake news!

 

 

 

Filed Under: featured, satire Tagged With: Donald Trump, golf, Kim Jong-un, north korea, nuclear program

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