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Michele … Don’t Ask God If You Should Run For Senate, Ask Nate Silver

January 4, 2018 By John DeProspo 2 Comments

Former Congresswoman, Michele Bachmann, is contemplating running for Al Franken’s soon-to-be-vacated Senate seat in Minnesota.

Bachmann, who represented Minnesota’s 6th Congressional District for eight years, said in an interview on “The Jim Bakker Show” that people had urged her to run in 2018. She also said she is asking God if she should enter the race.

Bad idea, Michele. No, not entering the Senate race but asking God if you should run.

Let’s face it, God has a poor record of picking winners.

Do you remember all those presidential candidates in 2016 that stated God had asked them to run? Let me remind you.

You had Mike Huckabee and Rick Santorum, of course. But you also had Scott Walker, Ben Carson and Rick Perry who admitted God wanted them to run. You even had Ted Cruz, Marco Rubio, John Kasich and Rand Paul alluding to God in their campaign announcements.

It seems as if the only 2016 presidential candidate who did not claim God asked him to run was Donald Trump. OK, he did say the Bible is his favorite book!

The thing is this, Michele. Either God is a poor picker of winners or he has a wicked sense of humor. Whichever it is, don’t bother asking God for his blessing.

Ask Nate Silver of FiveThirtyEight.com.

Nate is great at predicting political winners and losers because he uses math and statistics. Yes, he’s a lot more scientific than the Almighty.

Okay, okay, what about Mike Pence you ask. Didn’t he say running for vice president was all part of God’s plan?

Yes he did. Yes he did. But Pence was not talking about the same God as you are.

Mike Pence was not referring to the God that sits on his heavenly throne but the deity who sits on his golden toilet at 725 Fifth Avenue, New York, NY.

One last thing, Michele. Remember the last time God asked you to run for office? Because of his divine command, you ran for president in 2012. How did that work out?

Photo | politicususa.com

 

 

 

Filed Under: featured, Opinion Tagged With: Al Franken, Donald Trump, God, God's blessing, Michele Bachmann, Minnesota, Nate Silver, Senate, senate race

Congressional Republicans Embark On Path To Self-Destruction

December 20, 2017 By John DeProspo 2 Comments

The Republican-controlled House and Senate just passed a tax bill that hurts everyone except millionaires, billionaires and corporations. Why would they do that? Why would they vote for a bill that is strongly opposed by a majority of Americans? Don’t they realize the mid-term elections are on the horizon? Don’t they understand a riled up electorate will surely kick them out of office?

To understand this paradox, it helps to recall the tale of the scorpion and the frog.

One day, a scorpion looked around at the mountain where he lived and decided that he wanted a change. So he set out on a journey through the forests and hills. He climbed over rocks and under vines and kept going until he reached a river.

The river was wide and swift, and the scorpion stopped to reconsider the situation. He couldn’t see any way across. So he ran upriver and then checked downriver, all the while thinking that he might have to turn back.

Suddenly, he saw a frog sitting in the rushes by the bank of the stream on the other side of the river. He decided to ask the frog for help getting across the stream.

“Hellooo Mr. Frog!” called the scorpion across the water, “Would you be so kind as to give me a ride on your back across the river?”

“Well now, Mr. Scorpion! How do I know that if I try to help you, you wont try to kill me?” asked the frog hesitantly.

“Because,” the scorpion replied, “If I try to kill you, then I would die too, for you see I cannot swim!”

Now this seemed to make sense to the frog. But he asked. “What about when I get close to the bank? You could still try to kill me and get back to the shore!”

“This is true,” agreed the scorpion, “But then I wouldn’t be able to get to the other side of the river!”

“Alright then…how do I know you wont just wait till we get to the other side and THEN kill me?” said the frog.

“Ahh…,” crooned the scorpion, “Because you see, once you’ve taken me to the other side of this river, I will be so grateful for your help, that it would hardly be fair to reward you with death, now would it?!”

So the frog agreed to take the scorpion across the river. He swam over to the bank and settled himself near the mud to pick up his passenger. The scorpion crawled onto the frog’s back, his sharp claws prickling into the frog’s soft hide, and the frog slid into the river. The muddy water swirled around them, but the frog stayed near the surface so the scorpion would not drown. He kicked strongly through the first half of the stream, his flippers paddling wildly against the current.

Halfway across the river, the frog suddenly felt a sharp sting in his back and, out of the corner of his eye, saw the scorpion remove his stinger from the frog’s back. A deadening numbness began to creep into his limbs. 

“You fool!” croaked the frog, “Now we shall both die! Why on earth did you do that?”

The scorpion shrugged, and did a little jig on the drowning frog’s back. 

“I could not help myself. It is my nature.“

Then they both sank into the muddy waters of the swiftly flowing river.

Congressional Republicans may have committed political suicide but they could not help themselves. Passing tax cuts for their mega-rich, powerful donors is in their nature.

Photo | thinglink.com

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: featured, politics Tagged With: billionaires, congressional Republicans, frog, House, millionaires, political suicide, scorpion, self-destruction, Senate, tax bill, tax cuts, unpopular

“God Wants Judge Roy Moore” Video

December 6, 2017 By John DeProspo 2 Comments

Judge Moore’s latest, most powerful new commercial sure to get him to Washington.

Courtesy of The Spiegel Group/ D.C.Douglas

Photo | truepundit.com

***The Daily Nooze*** – named #10 top political satire blog by blog.feedspot.com. Like us on ranker.com (#43)

Filed Under: featured, satire Tagged With: Alabama, commercial, election, God, pedophile, Republicans, Roy Moore, satire, Senate

Republicans Pull Off Greatest Tax Heist In U.S. History … All In Plain View

December 2, 2017 By John DeProspo 2 Comments

Today, fifty-one Republican senators voted, in the dark of night, to repay their wealthy benefactors by approving a “tax cut bill” that enriches the country’s millionaires and billionaires at the expense of everyone else.

In a rational universe, those fifty-one senators would have in effect signed their own death warrants. But we do not live in a world ruled by reason.

Here is a list of the fifty-one U.S. Senators who voted to take from the have-nots to give to the have-it-alls:

Lamar Alexander, Tenn

John Barrasso, Wyo.

John Boozman, Ark.
Richard M. Burr, N.C.
Thad Cochran, Miss.
John Cornyn, Tex.
Steve Daines, Mont.
Michael B. Enzi, Wyo.
Jeff Flake, Ariz.
Lindsey Graham, S.C.
Charles E. Grassley, Iowa
Orrin G. Hatch, Utah
James M. Inhofe, Okla.
Johnny Isakson, Ga.
Ron Johnson, Wis.
James Lankford, Okla.
John McCain, Ariz.
Mitch McConnell, Ky.
Rand Paul, Ky.
David Perdue, Ga.
Rob Portman, Ohio
Pat Roberts, Kan.
Michael Rounds, S.D.
Tim Scott, S.C.
Richard C. Shelby, Ala.
Luther Strange, Ala.
John Thune, S.D.
Thom Tillis, N.C.
Patrick J. Toomey, Pa.
Roger Wicker, Miss.
Todd Young, Ind.
Roy Blunt, Mo.
Shelley Moore Capito, W.Va.
Bill Cassidy, La.
Tom Cotton, Ark.
Michael D. Crapo, Idaho
Ted Cruz, Tex.
Joni Ernst, Iowa
Cory Gardner, Colo.
Dean Heller, Nev.
John Hoeven, N.D.
Mike Lee, Utah
Jerry Moran, Kan.
Lisa Murkowski, Alaska
Jim Risch, Idaho
Marco Rubio, Fla.
Ben Sasse, Neb.
Dan Sullivan, Alaska
Susan Collins, Me.
Deb Fischer, Neb.
John Kennedy, La.

The reality is that few of these senators, if any, will pay a political price. Their supporters won’t know how badly the falsely advertised “middle class tax cut” bill actually hurts them … if not immediately, then in the near future.

It’s unfortunate that the best news of the day (Flynn pleading guilty and flipping on Trump) is immediately followed by the Republican “reverse-Robin Hood” tax scam.

Photo | Tom Brenner/The New York Times

 

Filed Under: breaking news, featured Tagged With: fifty-one Republicans, list of senators, repay benefactors, Republicans, reverse Robin Hood, Senate, tax bill, tax cut bill, tax cuts, tax scam, wealthy

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