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Unable To Stop Bolton Book, Trump Threatens To Sue Anyone Who Buys It

June 20, 2020 By John DeProspo 7 Comments

Reprint from moronmajority.com

He’s at it again.

Now that a judge has ruled John Bolton can publish his tell-all book, the man who elevated the filing of frivolous lawsuits into an art form is threatening to sue anyone who has the nerve to buy a copy of the juicy memoir.

Donald Trump has never been a man to take rejection lightly. Whenever he has found himself up against a wall, he threatens to take legal action.

Yes, Trump might be forced to file millions of lawsuits but that won’t stop the “king of litigation.”

Writing in today’s Washington Post, Dana Milbank gives a great summary of all the people or entities Trump has sued or threatened to sue:

“Since 2015, Trump, his business or the Republican Party have sued or threatened to sue MSNBC, NBC, the Associated Press, the Daily Beast, Univision, an anti-Trump T-shirt maker, authors Michael Wolff and David Cay Johnston, Texas Sen. Ted Cruz (R), former Ohio governor John Kasich (R), a Jeb Bush supporter, a super PAC, the Republican Party, sanctuary cities, former aide Steve Bannon, former Senate Democratic leader Harry Reid, the U.S. Golf Association, a 92-year-old widow in Scotland, the women who alleged he sexually assaulted them, the co-author of his own memoir, the Club for Growth, the Culinary Workers Union, the National Hispanic Media Coalition, the organizer of a “Dump Trump” campaign, the city of Minneapolis, and an artist who painted a nude of him.”

“Before that, he sued or threatened to sue the Los Angeles Times, USA Today, a Chicago Tribune architecture critic, Bill Maher, the now-deceased rapper Mac Miller, the Village Voice, ABC and the BBC, a random Twitter user, a woman critical of Trump University, a critic of his golf courses, a Miss USA contestant, Rosie O’Donnell, the Obama Justice Department, and the Onion.”

Milbank, surprisingly, failed to mention the time Trump threatened to sue Mother Teresa.

For Trump, the underlying motive for his litigation threats is intimidation. Trump believes the mere mention of the word “lawsuit,” and all the costs it entails, will stop people with perfectly winnable cases from taking him on.

As Milbank ends his piece, “If you can’t beat ‘em, sue ‘em.”

Photo | skynews.com

Caution – this could be “fake” nooze

Filed Under: featured, satire Tagged With: book, Donald Trump, John Bolton, lawsuit, litigation, publication, satire, sue, tell-all book

Trump Threatens To Sue Founding Fathers

October 22, 2019 By John DeProspo 3 Comments

Resorting to his most tried-and-true tactic, Donald Trump has threatened to sue the framers of the United States Constitution. Citing how unfair and restrictive the document is to his presidency, Trump is seriously looking into a “very big” lawsuit against the legends of American history.

“I’m going against the whole lot of them,” said an angry Trump. “Washington, Hamilton, Franklin, Adams, Jefferson Jay and Madison.”

According to sources, Trump is upset how those American patriots and visionaries have hamstrung his presidency at almost every turn with their “phony constitution.” Asked Trump, “What good is being president if I can’t do whatever I want to do?”

“The president’s first instinct on these types of things is very often: Sue, sue, sue, and then sue some more,” said a close confidant of the Suer-in-Chief.

Trump’s personal attorneys, Jay Sekulow and Rudy Giuliani, have not informed Trump that it is not possible to bring a lawsuit against people who have been dead for over 200 years.

“I learned long ago never to question the wisdom of perhaps the most brilliant president in American history,” said Giuliani with a straight face. “The man usually gets what he wants.”

While seemingly incredible, it is being reported that Trump has consulted with the former slave and famed American intellectual, Frederick Douglass, in his pursuit of legal action against the authors of the Constitution.

“Frederick Douglass is an example of somebody who’s done an amazing job and is getting recognized more and more, I notice,” said Trump.

Whether or not Trump actually follows through with his threat of legal action remains to be seen. If history is any guide, Trump’s threats to sue will amount to nothing more than a way to intimidate his enemies … dead or alive.

Photo | history.com

 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: featured, satire Tagged With: Constitution, Donald Trump, Founding Fathers, lawsuit, satire, sue, suer-in-chief

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