Trump Admits Missing Old Life … But Regrets?

In a Reuters interview last Saturday conducted in the Oval Office, President Donald Trump let his guard down and made some revealing statements.

“I loved my previous life. I had so many things going,” Trump said. “This is more work than in my previous life. I thought it would be easier.”

Before becoming president, Trump was able to golf three times a week. Now with the awesome responsibilities that come with being the leader of the free world, he is down to only two rounds … on weekends.

Instead of being the star of his own reality show, he now must share the spotlight with a co-star, Mike Pence, and a cast of untalented bit players.

Instead of being able to step out on the town and force himself on any woman of his choosing, he is hemmed in, round the clock, by the Secret Service.

Instead of pretending to work, he is now actually expected to do so on behalf of the American people.

Asked how he would feel if the several investigations into his ties with Russia forced him out of office or resulted in impeachment, the president broke into song …

And now, the end seems near

   We may be facing another Iron Curtain

My friend, I’ll say it clear

   I’ll state my case, of which I’m certain

I’ve lived the life of a con

   I’ve traveled each and every highway

But more, much more than this

   I did it my way

Regrets, I have not one

   At least not any I care to mention

I did what I had to do

   And saw it through without exemption

I never planned a goddamn thing

   Seems I got swept into office one day

But, oh, I’ve had a big, beautiful ride

   I did it my way

If it’s any consolation, Trump’s admission that he misses his old life has struck a sympathetic chord with a majority of Americans. Through their actions (daily marches), they have made it clear they’d be perfectly content if Trump were to choose to go back to his previous life and leave the running of the country to grownups.

Caution – this article may contain fake news!

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