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McCrory Doubles Down On “Tinkle Down” Politics

May 10, 2016 By John DeProspo 8 Comments

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Ronald Reagan pushed the notion that if you made the wealthy richer, crumbs would “trickle down” to the less fortunate thereby generating economic growth. This economic theory came to be known as “Reaganomics.” Some opponents, however, derisively called this sham, “tinkle down” economics … a conservative economic system that essentially tells the poor and middle class, “piss on you!”

Today, thanks to North Carolina Gov. Pat McCrory, “tinkle down” has a whole new meaning.

When Gov. McCrory signed into law a bill regulating which bathrooms transgender people could use within the state, he stirred up a hornet’s nest. The fallout from the new “tinkle down” law was not only political but also financial. Major corporations labeled it discriminatory, saying it ran counter to their principles of equality and mutual respect for all citizens.

Since the law’s enactment just over one month ago, North Carolina has lost millions in revenue from conventions cancelled, concerts scrubbed and family vacations rebooked.

If this weren’t bad enough, yesterday, after having been given an ultimatum to repeal the law or else, North Carolina chose “or else” and was swiftly sued by the Justice Department.

Said Attorney General, Loretta Lynch, “This action is about a great deal more than just bathrooms.  This is about the dignity and respect we accord our fellow citizens and the laws that we, as a people and as a country, have enacted to protect them – indeed, to protect all of us.  And it’s about the founding ideals that have led this country – haltingly but inexorably – in the direction of fairness, inclusion and equality for all Americans.

Rather than see HR2 (as the anti-LGBT bill is formally known) for what it is – unconstitutional, unnecessary, and counterproductive, Gov. McCrory decided to “double down” by taking on the Justice Department over the law’s repeal. Now the people of North Carolina can add millions in wasted legal fees to the cost of discrimination.

North Carolina is not alone in passing a useless law for a problem that doesn’t exist. Other Republican-controlled legislatures have followed suit or are planning to do so.

If Republicans have shown themselves to be good at one thing, it is never admitting error. Look for this legal battle to find it’s way to the Supreme Court.

Bobby Jindal, in a moment of clarity, labeled his party, the “stupid party.” Boy does the GOP have its hands full these days with stupid stuff!

Photo | youtube.com

 

Filed Under: politics

Hats Off To Donald Trump!

May 9, 2016 By John DeProspo 2 Comments

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The presumptive Republican presidential nominee, Donald Trump, has announced sales of his “Make American Great Again” hats have just crossed the $4 million mark. The marketing genius humbly admitted he is stunned by the success of the campaign headgear.

“I’m amazed but so proud of the job my people did with these hats,” said Trump.

When asked what he thought accounted for the hat’s big success, Trump replied, “It’s the message. We need to make this country great again. We have to start winning again. Been losing for way too long. Plus, I must say, the fact that the hats are beautiful and come in twelve different colors helps.”

When questioned if he is making a profit on the hats, Trump quickly snapped, “Why of course! We make them for $3 a pop in a factory in Mexico and sell them retail for $25. You do the math.”

Trump said the profits from his hats all go to his reelection campaign fund.

“But what if you don’t get elected?” I timidly asked. Trump, always the optimist, said, “Me lose to the most hated Democratic candidate in history? I don’t think so.”

Trump revealed that he has many marketing ideas once he and Melania occupy the White House.

“I’m seriously thinking of turning the back White House lawn into a pitch and putt. You know, for our Lincoln bedroom guests. But unlike those shysters, Bill and Hillary, there will be no charge for staying over night. We will, however, request a small contribution to the Trump presidential library.”

“But my best idea,” said an excited Trump, “is a White House calendar featuring our new First Lady, Melania, in tasteful poses throughout our new home. The keyword here is ‘tasteful’, nothing trashy your car mechanic would put up on his wall.”

“I gotta tell you,” said Trump, with a contented look on his face, “My wife may be 46 but I must say she is still every bit a 10. She will be the most beautiful, classiest First Lady this country’s ever seen!”

While Trump was thrilled at the success of his hats, he admitted he was very disappointed in his T-shirt sales.

“Perhaps if those nincompoops down in Mexico didn’t screw up the order, I wouldn’t be stuck with 80,000 shirts! Who wants a “Make American Grate Again” shirt, you tell me!”

Photo |news2morrow.com

 

Filed Under: satire

Rick Perry Endorses Cancer

May 7, 2016 By John DeProspo 6 Comments

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During his brief run for the 2016 Republican presidential nomination, Rick Perry tired something different- an image makeover. To give himself the aura of an intellectual, a candidate with gravitas, he started wearing glasses. In the end, no one bought the chicanery. Everyone realized he was the same guy who, during his last presidential run in 2012, got tripped up during a debate trying to count to three – his infamous “oops” moment.

On September 11, 2015, during a conference in Missouri, and still sporting the new bespectacled look, Perry formally announced his withdrawal from the presidential race. The thing is, much of what Perry said that day, and during most of his short run, made perfect sense!

Two months after Trump entered the Republican race, Perry compared the billionaire/TV celebrity to a “cancer” on the conservative movement.

Said Perry, “Let no one be mistaken – Donald Trump’s candidacy is a cancer on conservatism, and it must be clearly diagnosed, excised and discarded. It cannot be pacified or ignored, for it will destroy a set of principles that has lifted more people out of poverty than any force in the history of the civilized world – the cause of conservatism.”

While still the four-eyed candidate, Perry often stressed he was “offended” by Trump’s comments about Mexico sending rapists and drug dealers to cross the border. After Trump questioned John McCain’s record as a war hero (Trump likes people who aren’t captured) Perry called on Trump to drop out of the race, saying the attack made him unfit to be Commander-in-Chief.

Perry, still wearing specs, also made this sagacious comment about the presumptive Republican presidential nominee: he “offers a barking carnival act that can best be described as Trumpism: a toxic mix of demagoguery and mean-spiritedness and nonsense that will lead the Republican Party to perdition if pursued.”

During his exit speech, Perry wisely observed, “We can secure the border and reform our immigration system without inflammatory rhetoric, without base appeals that divide us based on race, culture and creed… Demeaning people of Hispanic heritage is not just ignorant, it betrays the example of Christ. We can enforce our laws and our borders, and we can love all who live within our borders, without betraying our values.”

Perhaps this was indeed a new, smarter Perry? Maybe the voters gave up too early on the two-time presidential contender? Maybe the glasses transmitted a level of rationality to his brain?

Or maybe not.

Yesterday, the former Texas governor endorsed cancer for president – Donald J. Trump.

“I believe in the process,” Perry said during an interview with CNN, “and the process has said Donald Trump will be our nominee and I’m going to support him and help him and do what I can.” Hint: I’m available for cancer VP.

News reports failed to say whether or not Perry was wearing his glasses when he made his surprising endorsement.

Photo | cbsnews.com

 

 

 

Filed Under: politics

Not So Fast, Dems

May 6, 2016 By John DeProspo 4 Comments

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Before all you Democrats start hooting and hollering; before you thank your lucky stars that Donald J. Trump will be the Republican presidential candidate, you need to press the pause button.

Yes, Trump is an intellectual and political lightweight compared to Hillary but as we have seen before, the smartest kid in the class doesn’t always come out on top. The bookworm is almost never the most beloved classmate.

If Hillary and her handlers think they can beat Trump by attacking his lack of political experience, his lack of policy chops, the absurdity of his proposals, or his overall lack of gravitas, they better go back to the 2000 Bush v. Gore election and do a little boning up.

Could the Republicans have come up with a more intellectually uncurious, academically challenged presidential candidate than George W. Bush? A “gentlemen’s C” student at Harvard never given to deep thought or deep knowledge of anything other than perhaps oil and baseball. Yes, it was going to be a sure win for the  scholarly, politically experienced Al Gore and the Democratic Party.

We all know how that went down.

The turning point in that race came during the first presidential debate. As Bush answered questions in less than a clear and intelligible manner, the camera kept focusing on Gore and his facial expressions. Gore was caught rolling his eyes, shaking his head, frowning and sneering. He was deemed the clear loser of the debate not on the content of what he said but on his body language!

Gore came off at that first debate as the intellectual snob who only has condescension for the less gifted competitor. A veritable Mr. Goody two-shoes. Certainly not the type of guy you’d want to have a drink with! Now Georgie… there’s a guy who can relate to the common folk! Gore tried to change his style in later debates but it was too late. The mold was set right then and there.

What Hillary has to understand is that Trump supporters, many involved in presidential politics for the very first time,  are excited and motivated. They have shown themselves to not care a whit about policy positions or realistic proposals. If she goes too hard on asking exactly how he would build his wall or deport 11 million illegals, she is playing into Trump’s hands.

Today’s voters are anti-establishment, both Republican and Democrat. They do not want a Washington insider to occupy the White House. And can one be more of an establishment insider than Hillary?

Voters favor Trump because he is not a politician corrupted by political experience or lobbyists’ money.

Hillary, more than Trump, is the candidate who needs to rebrand herself. It will be a tough task, for sure. You can bet Trump will paint Clinton as a crooked political insider, bought and paid for by big money. He will go where Sanders has tried to go but in a  more Trumpian (ruthless) way. “Why won’t you show us the transcript of that speech you gave to Goldman Sachs for $250,000, Hillary? What are you hiding?”

If Hillary comes off as the next Al Gore, Democrats will be in big trouble. We just might be looking at President Trump.

Photo | youtube.com

 

 

Filed Under: politics

Trump v. Clinton … This Could Get Ugly

May 5, 2016 By John DeProspo 4 Comments

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Barring some seismic shake-up within the Democratic Party, the 2016 presidential race will be a match between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton.

During the Republican primaries, Trump has displayed a knack for belittling his opponents by branding them with simple, derogatory nicknames. We got, “Low-energy” Jeb, “Little” Marco and “Lyin” Ted.

What put down will Trump come up with for Hillary? What nickname will he saddle her with? My money is on Trump going full misogynistic. He will attack Hillary’s looks. If I had to guess, Trump’s nickname for Clinton will be “Grandma” Hillary.

You can almost hear these insults being hurled at Hillary:

You know, folks, “Grandma” Hillary would be the second oldest president in our country’s history, just after Reagan. Do we want to see “Grandma” Hillary turn into Golda Meir right before our eyes?

Even in her prime, Hillary was never more than a 4.

With Hillary in the White House, it will be pantsuit city. Can you imagine her at formal state dinners? Nothing like how Melania will look as First Lady, I’ll tell you that!

I gotta tell you. I feel sorry for Bill. Guys you know what I mean..

Hardly a face for Mt. Rushmore, don’t you agree?

I have many friends who are plastic surgeons. They all say plastic surgery can only go so far.

Look at that face! Would anyone vote for that? Can you imagine that, the face of our next president? (Fiorina reprise)

Of course none of this will help Trump with the female vote. But Trump just doesn’t care. As of now, his mysogynistic rants have not hurt him. They have actually helped him among his largest bloc of primary voters, under-educated males. This will not be the case in a general election, however.

I have no doubt Trump will play the “gender/looks” card. The man just won’t be able to help himself.

Trump supporters have already come out with one pretty offensive campaign button:

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Yes, the battle between Trump and Clinton could get ugly… fast.

Photo | thegatewaypundit.com

 

 

 

Filed Under: Uncategorized

Cruz Aborts Campaign – Supporters Unhappy

May 4, 2016 By John DeProspo 7 Comments

U.S. Senator Ted Cruz, a Republican from Texas, listens during Bloomberg Television in New York, U.S., on Wednesday, March 24, 2015. Cruz said his presidential run will be about bringing people together—even including social liberals, if they're interested. Photographer: Victor J. Blue/Bloomberg *** Local Caption *** Ted Cruz

Following his crushing defeat in yesterday’s Indiana primary, Ted Cruz has suspended his campaign for the Republican presidential nomination.

That he would chose to abort his attempt at the nomination, so late in the election cycle, has angered many loyal Cruz supporters.

“God picked him to be our next president,” said Tanya Bates. “That he would defy the will of the Almighty and announce such a late term aborting of his candidacy is nothing short of immoral.”

Cruz justified his action by noting he did not see any clear path to securing his party’s nomination. Yet supporters have noted that Ohio Gov. John Kasich could say the same thing but has chosen to carry his quest for the nomination full-term, all the way to the Republican National Convention in Cleveland this July.

“Dropping out of the race is not Ted’s choice to make,” said another Cruz supporter, Abigail Brown. “He was chosen by God to be our savior and now this?”

When confronted directly on his controversial decision, Cruz said. “Look, I understand running for any public office is a sacred thing. I also know choosing to leave a race should only be done under narrow circumstances… like running out of money. In the end, I believe in a candidate’s right to chose.”

Cruz’s father and born-again pastor, Rafael Cruz, was asked his opinion about his son’s shocking choice.

“God has great things in store for my son. I believe with all my heart he is a prophet of the Lord. But I support Ted’s decision to abort his campaign. No, God hasn’t given up on Ted. Nor Ted on God. There will be other opportunities in the future,” said the evangelical minister, hinting at a future run for the presidency by his son. “ God works in mysterious ways.”

Still, Cruz’s supporters are calling him a hypocrite and campaign killer. They have pledged never again to support him for any public office. They insist once God has tapped you to do something, you better well do it or risk eternal damnation. Some are calling Cruz’s choice to abort a mortal sin.

“I am at peace with my God,” said Ted Cruz. “He is merciful and understanding. He, in his wisdom, understands I did what I did because, well, I had no other option.”

Photo |  Victor J. Blue/Bloomberg

Breaking News! Kasich has also aborted his campaign! 

 

 

 

 

Filed Under: satire

It’s Official … Americans Have Lost Their Minds

May 3, 2016 By John DeProspo 10 Comments

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With Donald Trump winning today’s Indiana primary, it is all but certain he will be the Republican presidential standard bearer come November. Call Trump what you want: buffoon, con artist, racist, narcissist, whatever. As surreal as this may be, get used to calling him Donald J. Trump, the 2016 GOP presidential nominee.

Trump’s only real competitor, Ted Cruz, saw the crushing loss in Indiana for what it was … the end of the road. He announced his formal withdrawal from the presidential race while, at the same time, vowing to never give up fighting for his principles. Might we see Cruz again, at a future date, as a possible Republican presidential nominee? You betcha!

On the Democratic side, Bernie Sanders beat Hillary Clinton in the Hoosier State. But since delegates are awarded proportionately (unlike Republicans), the math didn’t improve much for Bernie. He is still far behind Clinton in the pledged delegate count and is trailing badly among super delegates.

Folks, we are looking at a thrilling Trump v. Clinton slugfest, race towards the bottom.

With Trump you get an inexperienced real estate billionaire and TV reality star that has offended just about every group needed to win a general election. A candidate heartily endorsed by the KKK because his views on immigrants closely resemble theirs. A candidate who likes to call women bimbos and pigs. A candidate who will build the most beautiful wall you’ve ever seen along the Mexican border… and have Mexicans foot the bill! A candidate who will defeat ISIS in a matter of weeks. Yea that guy.

With Clinton you get a highly experienced politician who has paid her dues and believes the presidency is rightfully hers. A candidate seeped in one scandal after another going back to her days as First Lady. A candidate who commands $250,00 speaking fees from Wall Street fat cats. A candidate whose family foundation, the Clinton Foundation, has accepted millions from questionable foreign sources. A candidate progressive Democrats label a Republican. Yea that woman.

If Donald Trump were indeed the Republican presidential nominee, he would be the most despised presidential nominee in our nation’s history. Following close behind, Hillary Clinton would be the second most disliked nominee… ever.

No matter who wins in November, our nation’s next president will be abhorred by huge segment of Americans. The issue for voters will be which candidate is the lesser of two evils; the less polarizing and less detested of the two presidential candidates.

As the Soviet-born comedian, Yakov Smirnoff, might say, “What a country!”

Photo | cnn.com

 

Filed Under: politics

South Fighting Wrong “Trans” Battle

May 2, 2016 By John DeProspo 6 Comments

 

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Not to be outdone by other Republican-controlled legislatures, a small town in Alabama has actually made it a crime to use the wrong bathroom.

Oxford, Alabama unanimously passed an ordinance this week criminalizing the use of any public restroom that doesn’t correspond with a person’s gender listed on his or her birth certificate.

Anyone found violating the ordinance could face a $500 fine or up to six months in jail.

Perhaps southern states might better serve their citizens if lawmakers regulated “trans fats” rather than “trans genders.” Sure might help with that obesity problem, y’all.

 

Filed Under: politics

At Last Gig As Comedian In Chief, Obama Nails It

May 1, 2016 By John DeProspo 6 Comments

 

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Proving once again he is a natural at comedy, President Obama last night delivered his last White House Correspondents’ dinner speech to a room filled with journalists, celebrities and Bernie Sanders.

Bernie attended the formal affair in the same blue suit he routinely wears at his rallies while Jane, his wife, wore an elegant evening dress more appropriate for the black tie event.

Obama even quipped about Bernie’s look.

“Bernie you look like a million bucks. Or to put it in terms you’ll understand, you look like 37,000 donations of $27.”

Obama started his stand up routine by noting, if his material worked well, “I am gonna use it at Goldman Sachs next year.”

He observed that next year, “Someone else will be standing here in this very spot and it is anyone’s guess who she will be.”

Probably the best one-liner of the night came when Obama spoke of his recent, surprisingly-high approval ratings. “The last time I was this high,” said the President, “I was trying to decide on my major.”

As great as Obama was with his monologue, the real comedian and host for the evening, Larry Wilmore, was a flop. No doubt it is hard following an act like Obama’s. Add the fact that your material is not funny, and your delivery did not resonate with your crowd, it’s a given you will not be asked back for a repeat gig.

Contrary to what many of his detractors may think, Obama will go down as one of our nation’s best and most consequential presidents. He will no doubt be remembered as our country’s greatest Comedian in Chief … ever.

It is hard to imagine next year’s WHC dinner. Hillary just isn’t a natural at comedy like Barry.

Photo | politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com

 

Filed Under: politics

Donald Trump, For Once, Has A Point

April 30, 2016 By John DeProspo 3 Comments

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Say what you will about Donald Trump – he’s a racist, a demagogue, a fascist, a buffoon, a liar, a con artist, etc. But he is providing an important service to our country. He is reminding us of an uncomfortable truth few Americans care to accept. You see, far from being a nation of “exceptionalism,” we are a nation in decline.

The message is right there in Trump’s slogan … “Make American Great Again!” The keyword in the slogan, of course, is “again.” If America needs to be made great again, logic dictates it is no longer great. Could it be that Reagan’s once “shining city upon a hill” is now just a flickering metropolis having a hard time paying its electric bill? Is it really possible the once undisputed greatest nation on earth may now just be one of the great nations on earth?

Trump, in all his narcissistic renown, believes he is the only mortal who can restore our country to its former glory; to its rightful place among nations… number one. And this message of lost primacy is resonating with voters. You hear it in the chants at his rallies… USA! USA! USA! You hear it in his message about “winning.”

Trump has said, “We are a country that doesn’t win anymore. We don’t win anymore. When was the last time we won? We don’t win on trade. We don’t win on the military. We don’t beat ISIS. We don’t do anything. We’re not good. We’re just not the same place. We are going to win, so much.”

Trump, unlike any politician perhaps in this nation’s history, flat out tells us we’re a nation of losers.

In many ways, Trump is right. America has lost its mojo. But Trump might want to add these to his list of America’s shortcomings: we no longer win in education, in global competitiveness, in child well-being, in literacy, in national satisfaction, in health care efficiency, in wireless broadband, in gender equality or in freedom of the press. (https://rankingamerica.wordpress.com/page/4/)

But we Americans can take heart. We still lead the world in prison population and death by violence.

It is beyond ironic that the man who postulates America’s decline is himself direct evidence of the truth of his proposition! Only a nation that has lost its way (some might say its mind) could support a candidate as unqualified and divisive as Donald Trump. Only a political party fighting its own battle for survival could potentially make a slick snake oil salesman, in the person of Trump, its presidential nominee.

Donald Trump may be a serial liar but on America’s decline, he’s nailed it.  We just don’t win anymore!

Trump is the first presidential candidate in recent memory to run openly, and without apology, on a platform of America’s diminishing status. But why do I doubt most Trump supporters read his slogan, “Make American Great Again!” as critically as I do?

Photo | inside-out-politics.blogspot. com

 

Filed Under: politics

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